Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize
