she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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