i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
