U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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