she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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