Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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