Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Randomize
