5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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