bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
