my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
