He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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