that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize