She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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