It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
it hurts more in the daytime
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
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