grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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