just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
It's rum buckets o'clock
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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