I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
