There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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