Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
