i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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