so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
