you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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