ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Randomize
