He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
