Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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