16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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