He is such a slut. More and more my type.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
