so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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