just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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