There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Randomize
