I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
