I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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