i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
