Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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