I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
this is an emotional support booty call
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
