Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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