And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
