Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
