on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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