Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
