she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize