You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
