Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
My pussy is not your playground.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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