Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize