Me too!
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
i believe in u and ur pee
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
