You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
