I feel like I'm in dance class right now
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
and she was petting her beer can
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
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