Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize