Nicole vs. Life
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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