dude i'm inner monologue high
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
